Thursday, December 31, 2009

So Long 2000s

It's the last day of the year and the last day of the decade. It goes by so fast, as you get older. It was a fun decade. I became a man this decade. 2000 does seem so long ago, yet at the same time not as long as 10 years should be.

At the stroke of midnight 2000 I was atop my former best friend's apartment just a few blocks from where I am now. I'm suppose to go to a friends house in an hour. New Year's and Christmas always get built up all year long and they usually never live up to their reputations. I did have more fun this year as I planned through my New Year's resolution last year. I spent the last week with my mom who I only see about twice a year, it was the same as usual.

I look back at past New Year's, last year I was waiting a flight back to New York. I like the idea of spending some time in a house or apartment and getting drunk and high and partying and bringing in the new year with the ones closest to you, instead of a bunch of strangers. I overcame some of my demons this decade and hopefully I will continue to overcome the things that hold me down.

Happy New Year's to all. Peace and Abundance.

Monday, December 28, 2009

So tired..

I have so much trouble getting up in the morning, the last thing I want to do is get about of bed. Why don't I jump out of bed like some people? They can just jump out of bed and attack their day, and stay motivated all day long. I can't do that. I have no motivation for live. Some people can get motivated by life itself, that's it, just life. I need something in my day, something that I really like doing or having, to get me motivated. I can't get motivated about life on just a regular work day.

Maybe I need God to get me motivated. I thought about that and I know I can't go down that road. I am cursed with this consciousness, forcing me to think about things. I need to start getting motivated. I was thinking, maybe I need a life threatening experience to motivate me? Maybe I need to come close to death or suffer some big tragedy to make me realize what I have? I don't believe in karma or any of that crap. I believe shit just happens. So I don't think that God or the universe will put me through some tragedy to teach me a lesson. We should all try to learn from our life experiences for the better. Absolutely. I think I can learn to appreciate my life and all I have with out tragedy. It will need work though.

Monday, December 21, 2009

Hip Hop Morality

Morality is an important topic. I mean let's be honest, it's nothing less than how we ought to live. Growing up in the inner city in the 1990s I grew up surrounded by hip hop culture and now that I'm older I can look back and see how incredibly ignorant many of its principles and morals are. I've written about this before and want to hit it from a different angle, slightly.

Let's look at hip hop's morals and break them down. Generalizing a bit, in hip hop culture stealing what you don't have or can't afford is alright, in fact its recommended. Women are all either bitches or hoes, depending on their attitude or number of sex partners, and they are to be used like pieces of meat and treated like shit. It's ok to drop out of school and sell drugs, because "real niggas" don't go to school, come on. It's perfectly fine to use violence as a way to solve just about every problem, even murder. "Real men" get women pregnant and move on to others.

Now when you have a culture that raises generations of young people with these values it is no wonder that blacks and hispanics drop out of school at the highest rates and end up in jail the highest rates. I am by no means blaming hip hop or its greater culture for the problems of minorities, as these problems existed for many years before anyone set up two turntables and a microphone. But what hip hop culture did was it adopted the worst aspects of the 'hood, glorified it with out any realistic way of addressing the issues, and instead just shrugging its shoulders and saying "that's how it is."

I'm glad that hip hop culture is changing to the point where we don't see this huge gauntlet of credibility that rappers must pass through as much anymore. Rappers can be a little preppy and don't have to have grown up in the projects and have been shot 9 times.

The past is the past, let's look ahead now for our future and the next generation's future. I want to see an end to the violence and apathy I see in the inner city. I want to see more minorities involved in science and technology and philosophy. I want to see more minorities graduating school and getting regular jobs. I want to see an end to the gang culture that permeates through minority males all over the country. I want to see peace, prosperity and positivity. I want an end to the culture of ignorance.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

On Gay Marriage

Well, for those of you who read my blog about regular marriage, I just thought about gay marriage. I have nothing against it if they want to be married. I know that the argument against it is largely coming from religion in the old testament where God mentions his disdain for fags. Well like I've said before, if your going to take it literal then why aren't the christians taking the burning or adulterers literal or the stoning of girls who had sex before marriage? Why? Because christians are some of the biggest hippocrates in the word that's why.

Now if your against gay marriage for other reasons like the Qu'ran or Torrah you fall into the same category as the chrstians. If you're against gay marriage for other personal reasons like you think that it is scientifically unnatural, then we can talk because animals do engage in gay sex, and gay people are born gay, that is the definition of natural. They aren't created in a laboratory. That would be unnatural. If being gay was indeed a choice I'd be totally against gay marriage, but it is not and it is natural. Here is my definition of what marriage should be in terms of the parties involved: Marriage should be between two consenting adults, period. No animals, no groups of 3, 4, or 5 or more, just two consenting adults.


I do have some radical views on marriage. I'm kind of against it, but I have no problem with other people doing it. I just don't like the pressure society puts you under for not being married after a certain age. I'm in my late 20s and I definitely feel the pressure to get married. In a way I kind of want to, but I really don't think any marriage will work out for me. Number one, I'm crazy, I have extreme views and I have trouble finding girls as intellectual as I am. Most girls aren't into science, politics and religion.

The way I feel about marriage is this analogy: We've all had deep arguments with the people in our lives, our friends, parents, coworkers etc. Now imagine yourself at that point when you were in the middle of a ferocious argument with that person and someone ran up to you and asked you to sign a contract to promise to hate this person for ever and ever. You would think that's ridiculous because you know that you will eventually not be as angry with that person after some time has passed. I see marriage as being that ridiculous. Asking me to sign a life long legally binding contract based on an emotion like hate, or love I think is ridiculous. Love and hate are emotions that are are temporary and wane with time. Marriage is til death do you part.

I mean I do believe in love and being faithful to one person, but I don't like the idea of expecting it to last forever. I like the middle ground between being with one person forever and ever and being a player. It's hard to explain like a lot of stuff is.

Insomnia again

I'm up all night again. I was tired around 11pm and I was about to fall asleep, but then I remembered I hadn't brushed my teeth and I can't go to sleep with a dirty mouth. So I go up and brushed my teeth but then I couldn't fall back asleep. There is something about the bathroom and brushing my teeth or washing my face that wakes me up. So now it's 3 am and I'm still up. I just wish I had a normal sleep pattern. I got 2 hours of sleep last night and I was so tired all day, I wished I slept at 11pm, I should've brushed my teeth earlier so that when I got tired I;d be ready.

P.S. The "L" button on my keyboard is starting to fuck up and
I have to hit it really hard to work. This sucks.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Why I hate social networking sites

OK, you got me, social networking sites are a great way for people to connect right? I mean how else can you keep track of all your friends from elementary school that might have moved away across the country? How else would they be connected to you on a single software platform? Remember the days of AOL? Not everyone had it and you couldn't add everyone you ever met. Them came friendster and myspace and facebook, a web based, third party platform that everyone could go on too and connect with others. And indeed just about everyone did (well not for friendster).

I was into myspace early on but then didn't like it. I don't like the idea of everyone I've ever met being able to contact me. I guess I like privacy. I don't want everyone to know everyone I know, or even certain friends from knowing everyone I know. I don't want everyone i know from having access to me. I like to disappear from time to time from certain people or from all the people I know. I don't want them to know what I'm doing or who I am doing it with. I don't want them to even have a clue, such as a remark made by someone on my wall or someone else's. I don't like that fact that rumors can spread fast on social networking sites. I don't like how girls you date can be checking up on you, and how almost all of your business can be out on display.

Of coarse for the attention seeker social networking gets you out there like no other media can. You can be exposed to so thousands, millions who you'd never get a chance to, if it weren't for the digital media. Some people live for attention. We've all had fantasies of being famous. I myself enjoy privacy a little more. It's interesting how social networking sites allow you to control the way people see you.In a sense they allow you to create your reputation. If you want to portray yourself as a party monster all you have to do is show pictures of yourself getting wasted numerous times. If you want to appear intellectual you write about your favorite authors or philosophers along with there associated media. In a way you can control how others see you, especially to those who don't see you in person often.

It seems as if facebook is winning the popularity contest. It has over 300 million members and has given myspace a run for its money. It has a more simple format and a chat program. It doesn't allow users to customize the background and force youto listen to music in it. It did seem as if myspace became a way for people to advertise their music or companies. The criticism of myspace was that people's profiles became way to bloated with fliers and graphics and music. Facebook cleaned it up with a simple white background. And the masses went to facebook.

I have to admit that it is interesting to see people's profiles and what they write and who they are friends with. A person can spend hours and hours on facebook, and that's precisely what I hate it so much. It has become the conduit for which all social interaction takes place. I've lived with people who were on facebook or myspace almost every hour that they were online. It takes up so much of people's time that they lose touch with real social human interaction. Like I said before I see the benefits of social networking sites, but I don't take part in them because they can become addictive and result in a deficit of real interaction, I don't like people knowing who I know or what I say to those people I know, and mostly, I don't like people from my past being able to track me down and obtain information on me. This blog is anonymous. All you know about me is my name and maybe where I live. You know a great deal about my thoughts on a number of topics but not my identity. And that's the way I like it.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

A funny irony about our "christian" nation

Ahh yes, America. Our blessed christian country. Good thing we pray to the right God here. You know it's quite funny how in America when we see those backward muslims in some dark corner of the middle east or central asia, stoning or whipping some woman in public because she might have had sex outside of marriage or engaged in adultery, we are appalled and shocked. We love to call the muslims out on how uncivilized they are or how backward and sexist they are, but if you consider that the christian Bible, says adulterers and unmarried women who've had sex shall be put to death by stoning and even worse set on fire alive.

So how can we "christians" be appalled when we see those in the middle east doing almost exactly what the holy scripture says they should do? It clearly says in the Bible that for a woman who enters a marriage in which "the tokens of virginity be not found...the men of her city shall stone her with stones that she die."(Deuteronomy 22:20-21) Wow. So the west has caught up with the fact that actually stoning someone today for having sex before marriage seems a bit extreme, but parts of the middle east haven't, and when they do so we criticize them for not behaving morally when indeed the holy Bible, the text for which this great country was(supposedly)founded on says to do just that which the muslims in the middle east are doing. So who are the hippocrates here?

Saturday, November 28, 2009

A nice point

"Freedom of speech is meaningless, unless it's for the person who thinks differently."

A Philosophical argument part 2

The theist will say that man-made laws are arbitrary and can be erased and re-written at any moment and thus, whatever is right and wrong is only temporary. He will argue further and say that God's laws and morals are timeless and written in stone and are therefore not subject to the changing winds of political parties and leaders.

I disagree. While is do agree first that yes man-made laws can be changed at a moments notice and are therefore only binding when they are enforced and in power. I also believe that God's laws change over time too and that they are not permanent and that evolving morals can be a good thing.

First a person or persons can re-write a religion, I mean literally re-write the doctrine on which the religion is based on. All you have to do is look at the different sects with in the religions. Joseph Smith founded the Mormon church in upstate new york on a vision he had, and re-wrote the christian faith with new rules and regulations. The Shiites and the Sunnis disagree and a great number of things even though they all pray to essentially the same God. In fact, Islam is a complete re-writing of Christianity and Judaism.

Once slavery was excepted as the norm, then it wasn't. The Bible justifies slavery, but intelligent thinking, moral people decided it wasn't justified under any circumstances, and they changed moral attitudes toward slavery. If biblical morals were written in stone, we'd still have slavery and we'd still be stoning people to death for adultery and working on the sabbath.

Do you want to live in a society like that?

A Philosophical argument

A christian cannot say that the source or moral truth is God, or that there are no absolute morals without God.

Let me explain.

If a christian were to say raping and torturing a child is morally wrong he is missing the one part that should be added to the end that allows for the child to be raped and tortured if God commands him or her to do so. The jews on their way out of exodus were commanded by God to kill and rape all the other tribes that stood in their way to the land of Israel, the land that God gave to them. It was morally right for the jews to do so at that time and therefore it's possible that God can command some people again to kill other people.

So, the christian must say that killing and raping a child is morally wrong except when God orders you to do so. So basically when God orders you to do so, then everything is permitted.

The Bible says...

The Bible says that we shall kill unmarried virgins, homosexuals, those who work on the day of the sabbath(whatever day that may be), but then it says "Thou shall not kill" and that only those free of sin can "cast the first stone." So, I'm confused, am I to kill sinners by stoning or burning them to death, or not? If I do, will I be exempt from prosecution because I am following the commands of the Lord? Will that work in a modern day courtroom?

Is it just me or does the God of the Bible command us to do some pretty wicked things in his name? Well as they say "the Lord works in mysterious ways."

Saturday, November 21, 2009

The Ten Commandments

ONE: 'You shall have no other gods before Me.'

TWO: 'You shall not make for yourself a carved image--any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.'

THREE: 'You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain.'

FOUR: 'Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy.'

FIVE: 'Honor your father and your mother.'

SIX: 'You shall not murder.'

SEVEN: 'You shall not commit adultery.'

EIGHT: 'You shall not steal.'

NINE: 'You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.'

TEN: 'You shall not covet your neighbor's house; you shall not covet your neighbor's wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor's.'

What about Thou shall not rape? Or Thou shall not molest children? Or Thou shall not worship money(not just your neighbors)? Or Thou shall not have or keep human slaves? What a jealous God who devotes the first 3 commandments to himself and not some of the supposed universal truths that we live by today that I think would be better and more useful than to condemn worshiping another God.

Can morality exist with out God?

The argument is made by religious people again and again. “Without religion we wouldn’t know right from wrong.” I deeply disagree and let me tell you why. First off what is right and wrong? Is it relative to the culture, I think so. I don’t think that there are universal rights and wrongs. I can say that it is wrong to kill and steal and rape, the most basic evils that just about every society condemns. But what about killing in war, or self defense? Is it ok to kill in defense of your country, your religion or your freedom? There are times where it can be argued that killing is justified in some circumstances.

As to the basic question of whether we need divine information to know what is right or wrong, think about this point. Think if how complicated our man-made laws are here in the U.S. regarding every aspect of our society from children to the elderly to the credit cards in our wallets, to the dying, to the unborn. Our man-made laws are extremely complex so much so that you have to practically be a lawyer to understand your credit card agreement. Think about the internet, when this new technology came out we had to sit down and come up with rules and regulations and laws regarding what would be right and wrong on the World Wide Web. Would there be an expectation of privacy? Would it be free and open and not controlled by a monopoly? Would there be penalties for stealing information online? What would happen to child pornography senders and receivers?

We had to sit down and write all these rules about what is right and wrong, and we didn’t need divine intervention. In other countries their rules differ on what is right or wrong. My argument is simple: if we intelligent primates can think up extremely complex laws regarding every aspect of our society then we must have been able to think up the ten commandments or all the morals in the Bible, Torah, and Koran and all the other religious texts.

My new role model

I've been obsessed with writer Christopher Hitchens for the past few months. He is an public intellectual and an outspoken "anti-theist." He wrote the book "God is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything" which I have actually not read yet. The book has caused controversy and Christopher went around the country debating many theologians from the major religions over whether God was great. The debates are very exiting. In my opinion Christopher articulates the best argument against religion that I've heard so far. He destroys every one he debates with logical arguments and he words them so good with a little pinch of humor that makes his lectures insanely interesting.

I think that he is a very bright voice for reason and if you're interested in the subject of religion you should definitely check him out.

Saturday, October 10, 2009


Some have argued that people should need to have a license to have kids. I don't disagree but i think it would be hard to implement and enforce. what if a woman got pregnant and was unable to qualify for a license? Would the government take away her kids or force her to terminate it? Would there be penalties?

I think that a lot of our problems with bad people are due to the fact that we have a lot of bad parents. Abusive, neglectful, or entirely absent. There are people who have way too many kids. No one today should be having 5 kids, or 8 kids. I think people should have 2 kids maximum. In third world countries where people don't have access to contraceptives or where religion or cultural reasons forbid sex education, condoms, birth control or abortions, and where people are extremely poor, they are reproducing at an alarming rate. There is massive over population in many third world countries. This creates more poverty.

It is true every child is born innocent. They have no choice in what circumstances, economically, geographically, they are born into. But their parents are. When an adult chooses to bring a child into this world they are playing God. They know what type of situation that child is going to be born into. If people are so poor they can't even afford to buy a pair of shoes, why do they have so many kids that they are unable to care for? There are cultural reasons why people have lots of kids, many traditional cultures require a woman to bare lots of kids. It is a left over from our primitive days where humans were numbered in the few millions and there was rampant disease that killed a third of all babies born.

So, we are left with this instinct to have babies, have babies, have babies, and now there are almost nearly 7 billion of them and the earth's population will double in another 50 years or so.

I think we need to stop this ridiculous idea that we must populate and have lots of kids. There are too many kids on the planet and they are mostly coming from extremely poor parents who can't even afford to support themselves.

This is one reason why I am totally pro-choice when it comes to abortion and disagree with religion on issue relating to reproduction and contraceptives. I believe old school thinking, whether religiously based or not is ruining the lives of our children and the future of our planet and humanity.

Hip Hop's Problems

I was one of the first generations raised with hip hop since birth. I love the medium of hip hop as a form of self expression, to tell stories and ideas. It is an incredible art form.

Over the years as I've gotten older I began to turn away from hip hop and the hip hop lifestyle. Mind you, everyone who listens to hip hop doesn't behave or act a certain way, but generally hip hop culture produces a certain mentality that I think promotes ignorance, and is self destructive.

Over 50% of inner city high school students are dropping out, this has been happening for quite some time. Rappers brag about dropping out of school to sell drugs, how they hated learning and cut class. How many rappers brag about getting straight A's and pursuing higher education? Exactly.

Rappers are almost obligated to get involved in some legal trouble, as it adds to their street credibility. Getting caught with a gun, beating up a girlfriend or someone else, getting caught with drugs, knocking up random girls and getting them pregnant, all are positive acts that help rappers get respect and provide subject matter in their material. Almost every rapper has knocked up a girl and got her pregnant.

The materialism in hip hop speaks for itself. This worship of money and materialism as if it is the most important thing in the world is ridiculous. There are so many hip hop videos that show rappers with wads of cash and jewelry, with a face that says "look what I got, bitch, aren't you jealous?"

What impression does this leave on the minds of the listeners? Let's face it, hip hop culture is all about instant gratification, jealousy, envy, showing off, and worse of all greed. It's kind of like Wall Street, only drugs and albums are the main sources of income.

The critics say positive hip hop doesn't sell. I understand this, it's the same reason why sex sells in the movies and violence does too. I just wish there was a more intellectual sub genre of hip hop that was positive and also commercially viable. And I wish that we didn't have this incredible ridiculously ignorant standard for which we judge our rappers and what rappers are to have done. I wish "ghetto credibility" was a thing of the past.

Don't get me wrong, I respect the format of hip hop as an art form, but I will not embrace the culture of ignorance.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

It's Getting Cold

Fall is here and winter is coming....

It wasn't much of a summer anyway. It will probably be a long cold winter, but who knows, mother nature has a way of always surprising us.

I almost forgot about this blog. No one reads it and I don't really care.

I think I'll start writing about my politics and my huge interest in sociology, economics, religion and human nature. I have all these ideas in my head and I talk about them with my friends. But words disappear into thin air and are forgotten. The written word lasts much longer, so I feel I should write what I think so that it could exist maybe, possibly forever.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Making Music

I just got an electric guitar and I love it. I wish I had started making music much earlier. If in high school I started learning guitar I'd be really good by now, instead I'm just a beginner learning the foundation of musical guitar. I like to play hard rock and heavy metal, as well as the blues and some punk/indie. I hope that in a few years I am rocking my ass off as well as other people also.

When you can make music you can really impress people. I've always respected good musicians and I want to become one. Music has been my biggest passion through out my whole life. Other things have come and gone. I'm not trying to be a rock star or even in a band, I can't commit to that either. I just like making music for fun. It's a great hobby.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Fat people.....yes, fat people

With the nation in the middle of the often loud and angry health care debate, I have a few words about us Americans. We are fat, and we are the laughing stock of the world. People starve to death in some countries around the world, and our problem is that we have too much food. It's so funny when you really think about it. The problem is this: are fat people driving up health care costs? I believe they are, but they are clearly not the only problem. Smokers too drive up health care costs, as do people with other unhealthy lifestyles. I have a proposal, it's what I call a "fat Tax" on those people who I like to call 'gravitationally challenged."

I conjured up this this idea for the New York City subway, after one day not too long ago when I wanted a seat on the train and a "gravitationally challenged" person was taking up two seats, instead of the usual one and a half. I think that since "gravitationally challenged" people take up more space, it is only fair that they should pay more money to ride the train. Basically, we should pay for space.

It would work like this, to ride the subway you'd pay a penny for every pound you weigh. You weigh 250 lbs, you pay $2.50, you weigh 130 lbs, you pay $1.30. We'd all have to carry a new metrocard, and with this we'd swipe the machine and right before we walk through the turnstile, we'd have to step on a scale embedded into the ground that would digitally calculate our weight, including everything we carry. The fare would be calculated at 1 penny per pound, and that would be the price we are charged to enter the subway. So yes "gravitationally challenged" people would pay more. However, this system would encourage people to loose weight and live healthy, since they wouldn't want to have to pay more money. I think it's an ingenious idea, and most of us would actually be paying less than we pay now, including me. I feel this proposal is necessary because "gravitationally challenged" people do indeed take up a lot more space in areas where space isn't abundant, like the subway, and that means a lot less space for those of us who are not "gravitationally challenged."

I think my proposal is reasonable, fair and balanced, and I'm usually right.

Monday, August 24, 2009

My summer so far

So far it's been an OK summer. I didn't have anything bad happen to me, no major incidents. I've gone out drinking just about every night of the summer so far. I've been smoking a lot when I go out drinking. I smoked almost an entire pack last night, which is rare for me since I usually don't smoke more than half a pack. I can't help it sometimes when I get drunk and I'm around party people I want to smoke one after the other. I will quite again one day, just like I did for 2 years.

I haven't been keeping up to date on a lot of IT shit. I really should because in this industry you can never fall off the bandwagon. Summer ain't over yet, there is still actually another month of it. I'm always in school no matter what so its not like I have a vacation.

I haven't been working out a lot either. I mean I look good. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I think "damn." My chest looks nice, even though I'm skinny I'm happy that I don't have a flat bird chest. I got muscle tits. All I wish for is about another 15 pounds of muscle, that's it, and I'll be fine. I have a very fast metabolism which makes it very hard for me to gain weight. I don't have a really big appetite either. I've been basically 160-165 pounds since I graduated high school. Although my weight has dipped to 150 at times. It's funny because I want to gain weight unlike everyone else in America who wants to lose weight. I can lose a pound a day if I really want to. It's not a problem.

Drinking in the city

I went out drinking last night and spent $80. Damn. I didn't even see that coming. I usually don't like to spend more than $50 but last night I lost control. I had an ok night but was it worth $80? Not really. I should have pregamed it like I usually do but I didn't last night for some stupid reason. Thank God it didn't rain. I was supposed to go camping but that's out of the question since I have a Saturday class. Maybe in two weeks.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Growing up in NYC

There is something about New Yorkers. Growing up in NYC, was great. I wouldn't have wanted to grow up anywhere else. in NY you have the world at your doorstep. I had friends from all over the world. NYers party hard. Growing up me and my friends we would get drunk all the time when I was in high school. Smoking weed was just about an everyday thing also. Most people who grow up in NY like to party and drink and do drugs. I don't think there was anything wrong with that. I have two cousins who grew up in Maryland and thay were raised so goody-to-shoes to the point where I think they really missed out on a lot of life's experiences. All parents want to keep there kids from the bad things in life, I guess, I'm lucky that my parents were a bit loose.

Listen to kids who grew up in NY. Listen to their accent. NYers have a great slang that we use. Kids who grew up in NY do tend to be a little ghetto. Almost every kid in NY says the word "nigga" as if it was dude or man. Nobody else does that outside on NY. White kids in California don't use the "N" word, unless they're being racist. I'm not saying it's right or wrong it's just something about NY culture. I guess its because the hip hop culture started here, and that's why aspects of black culture are so ingrained here in the NY culture. I'm not sure exactly.

NY is the drug capital of the world. Every other friend of mine sold drugs growing up. And just about everyone was using. All the rich yuppies on Wall Street do drugs, most likely coke. If you didn't do drugs to me it seemed you were in the minority. Or maybe, my perception is just skewed in favor of drugs because my friends did drugs growing up, I'm not sure.

You can party hard in NY too. There are 10,000 bars and clubs in NY. Before I started going out I'd party at my friends cribs. We'd listen to music or make music, since many of my friends were musicians, and we'd drink and smoke. It was fun back then and I'm glad I lived it. I just wished that I had kept a journal back then to have documented some of the experiences, and turn it into a book.

Like I said I wouldn't have wanted to grow up anywhere else.

the truth and lies

Why do we have to lie to our children? We tell them myths about Santa Claus, and the tooth fairy. We have to tell them that they are the cutest and most special person in the whole universe. Why? Are children not capable of hearing the truth? That they are cute but not the cutest, and that they are just one of 6.5 billion people on the planet, and no more important than any other person.

At some point in our lives when we grow older we realize that we aren't the best, or cutest or the most special, although a few people still continue to feel that way. It's a very weird time in a child's life when he or she comes to that realization. We have to give our kids confidence because they are going to need it in this world. I don't feel my parents gave me enough confidence when I was growing up. I don't blame them for it necessarily, I think they were to young and inexperienced as parents. People back in the eighties didn't have all the knowledge that we have today when it comes to parenting. That is why I plan on waiting a long time to become a parent, if I do. I'm going to wait until my mid 30s until I even think about it. Even Barack Obama did that. It makes a person a better parent for sure.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Summer's almost over

It's mid August and we are in the dog days of summer. In just a few short weeks it will all be over and a long dark winter will set in. Summer always goes by so fast. I wish it could last a little longer. When I was a kid during summer vacation, summer seems to last so long, and today as an adult it goes by so fast. I wish I had gone out a little more during the day time. I'm usually working during the day and on the weekends I usually go out at night. I didn't even go to the beach once this year, but I'm really not a beach person. I'd like to go camping this summer, instead of doing the whole club/bar hopping thing.

My New Year's resolution this year was simply only to have more fun. I had a very boring 2008, and most of my entertainment was watching the election. This summer I've been going out every weekend partying and it's been great, with a few bad nights thrown in, it always happens. I still don't have my shit together, figuratively speaking. I'd like to be making more money so that I don't have to do everything cheap when I go out. Also, I always feel I need better friends. There are always things about the people I'm around that I don't like. Everyone I know has some issues that annoy me, such as there always broke, or they have a bad schedule, or they have a wife that wont let them hang out. I guess I should be thankful that about what I have.

Friday, August 14, 2009


Today, I could've done a nice work out but I didn't. I got kind of lazy. I really want to do a nice full body work out. That means, upper body, stomach, and legs. I really don't want to get lazy again. i had a nice schedule last winter, I'd work out every other day at least, sometimes more. It's still not too late now, I can cram a workout in before I go to bed. I've never gotten to that point where I get the body I want. I usually almost get there and then, I get lazy. I have to stop that.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009


I have been very lately with regards to working out. I'm suppose to do 150 situps a day and i have been doing about 150 a week, barely. It's hard to work out in te summer. Last winter i was working out almost every day. On top of that i started smoking again a few months ago, further worsening my health. This is very bad. I should work out at least twice a week. doing 150 sit ups is not hard at all, it's just that I get bitten by the lazy bug when I get home. I'm suppose to work out my legs also since I have these skinny pussy legs.

I don't have a weight problem at all, in fact I worry that i'm too skinny. I want to gain about 10 pounds of muscle. I feel being 175 lbs. is ideal for me and I'm really about 160-165. I have a fast metabolism that means if I skip a meal I can loose a few pounds. Sometimes when I'm busy I do skip meals and I notice my weight dropping. I hit a low of 150 recently and I don't like how I look when I'm too skinny.

I've noticed that my stomach is getting bigger and that really bothers me. When I gain weight it usually goes straight to my gut. And I know that when your gut gets bigger you will eventually reach a point where you are very hard pressed to get it flat and under control. Essentially you reach a point of no return. If you on the other hand can control it and keep it hard and tight, you will never get to that point.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Why all men are hippocrates

All men are hippocrates because we want to have sex with as many woman as we can, at least while we're young. We degrade women and objectify them and sometimes mistreat them when they don't respond to us like we'd like. But, then we get all defensive when some other guy says that same thing about our sister, our mom, or our daughter. All of a sudden it's not appropriate when it's a girl we know who is close to us. But that same woman we are objectifying and making lewd comments about is someone else's daughter, or sister. This is why I feel all men are hippocrates. Am I right or am I right?

Sunday, August 9, 2009


One thing I don't like is when people rely too much on fate. I don't believe in fate and here is why. If our life's paths are determined by our fate, if our love life and financial future is written in the stars, then we don't have free will over it, right? Basically if our journey has been pre-written for us and we cannot deviate from it, then what freedom do we have as individuals? I love it when I hear people say that what happened to them was God's will. In the Bible God gave us free will to determine our own paths. We make our own decisions and take responsibility for the consequences that result from them.

This is what I believe. And this is something I think we should all ask ourselves. Are we free individuals or are we controlled by God's Will? Is there a God?

Monday, August 3, 2009

Ok I don't hate women

So there are a few things that I have issues with about the fairer sex. But, I don't hate women, I love women. My mother was a woman, and still is. Women drive me crazy but then they give me pleasure, and it makes me forget about all the things I hate them for. This is an ongoing cycle. I just met a girl last weekend at a bar who acted like a total bitch to me. But then got really nice at the end of the night, well not really nice but nicer. I guess she wanted to see if I'd put up with her personality long enough to show that I'm not a shallow guy (right).

She didn't behave in the way I describe women on my list. She didn't care about money, which is good, I actually didn't have to spend almost any money on her. We'll see how it progresses.

Maybe I'll make a list of things about women that I like, but it might be a bit shorter.

Friday, July 31, 2009

10 things I hate about women

10 things I hate about women

1. I hate how women think it's perfectly OK to gain lot's of weight when you settle down with them.
2. I hate how women are pre-programmed to just want to settle down and have kids.
3. I hate it how women judge a man by what he has rather than who he is on the inside.
4. I hate how women aren't dirty perverts like how us men are.
5. I hate how women can go long periods of time with out sex and be totally fine with it.
6. I hate how women are totally obsessed with how sexy they are, and then they don't want to be looked at as sex objects.
7. I hate how women go out at night dressed all sexy and then say they aren't looking for someone to have sex with.
8. I hate how women use sex to get what they want out of men.
9. I hate it when women make a big ass deal when you try to talk to them, like you just violated their personal space or something and broke down there defensive barrier they use to protect themselves with.
10. I hate it when women expect you to pay for shit and then they consider themselves feminists who think men and women should be equal, you should be paying for your own damn shit then.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009


I'm blogging about blogging, today, or tonight, because I'm up with insomnia. I'm not into the whole twitter thing. The idea is interesting, you can know what all your favorite celebrities are thinking and doing almost in real time. The possibility of screwing up and typing something that you'd regret you wrote is huge, due to the impersonal nature of typing on your laptop in your bedroom at night. It won't be long until someone tweets something they'd regret and and then Al Sharpton blows his top and calls a press conference and goes on Larry King making his point. Celebrities are tweeting now and all different kinds of people in the media are doing it too. It's only a matter of time.

Monday, July 27, 2009


I hate my summer classes, they have nothing to do with my major and I already have an associates degree and I have taken these writing and career development classes already. I've already taken one at DeVry now. I don't know why they have to make us take it twice. It is a really annoying interruption in my studies. I, like most students I know, want to graduate as soon as possible. We are tired of school work and coming to class. We are already in the field or have one foot in the door already. Some are not yet ready for the field and we still have a lot to learn, but I feel that on the job training is the best way to learn once you already have the basic IT knowledge down. In any company you are going to need OTJT regardless of how smart you are. At this point I am sick of non-IT classes. I feel we aren't doing enough intense IT work, and especially labs, which is where we get our hands on experience. However, I know a person who just graduated from another school who still has a lot to learn, so I don't feel bad. I hate how this types over when I want to correct mistakes!!!!!

Thursday, July 23, 2009


I love music and I only recently started playing guitar seriously. I wish i had started playing when I was 14 because by now I'd be really good. I've gotten to the point where I can feel I play OK, but I'm still not good, yet. It will be a few years until i get good. I will try to practice as much as i can but I am very busy. I just ordered a new electric guitar since I am tired of playing my old acoustic one. I hope it gets here quickly.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Some thoughts on IT

Well. I love to mess around with computers, but sometimes I get lazy. I have fun at my internships getting to mess around with professional equipment. I love to learn and get challenged. I want to graduate school with at least a minimum of 1 year in the field experience. I think anyone graduating with out experince in the field is crazy. Unless your a genious or know somebody, you are not getting a job easy.

When I first got into the field I didn't know anything. I was lost. When I'd get hit with a hardcore IT problem I'd freak out, but now I'm so much more confident while I realize I still have a lot to learn. But learning never stops as well all know. In the IT field we have to constantly strive for excellence. If we get lazy we will get sidelined by our competition and get left off by the changing technology, and it does move fast. So hold on tight.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Summer day

I finished up early today after doing some support for a college I administer, then I went to look for a new guitar at Guitar Center. I don't want a cheap one, nor do I want an expensive one either. I want an electric guitar because I am tired of my old acoustic one. There's something about the power of an electric guitar that just doesn't exist without it.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

My day so far..

Today I got up feeling so tired, I didn't get much sleep last night due to some insomnia which comes and goes every now and then. I refuse to take any perscription drugs for it because I don't want to be a guinea pig for the drug industry, I don't like them. All you see is drug commercials on TV it's so annoying. I see about 10 Viagra commercials every hour and Enzyte ones too. They are making billions getting us insecure about everything so that we run out and buy their drugs.

Other than that I'm having an easy day at my job. It is an IT consulting company and it's pretty slow today, later I will do some support at a remote client in their computer lab. I lost my wallet on vacation a few weeks ago and it is really annoying because I had to get all my cards again and I haven't bought a new wallet yet so I have to carry cards in my pocket and I forget some now and then. I need a new wallet asap.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

My first blog ever

So today I am writing my first blog post ever. I love to write but never online in a blogging format. I'm only doing this because I have to, hence the name of my blog. It's weird how I never got into blogging considering my computer skills. I rarely ever read other people's blogs either and I have not gotten into the whole twitter craze. Maybe I should blog more to make my opinion heard since we have the means to do so this day and age. Maybe this could become a hobby for me? Maybe not we'll see.


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